2009年7月30日 星期四

无题~

人,
总在是非对错中度过,
谁错谁对,
谁在挑拨离间,
谁惹人厌,
谁被诬赖,
其实都不重要,
我们总问自己什么才是重要的,
却怎么也得不到一个明确的答案,
是谁遗忘了朋友之间最需要的是信任,
是谁遗忘了朋友之间最重要的是体谅,
究竟是谁遗忘了朋友的定义,
假设有一天,
你被所有人唾弃了,
你是在埋怨对方呢,
还是去反省为何事情会走到这个地步,
只可惜,
你选择了第一条路,
你不曾发现其实问题出在你身上,
难道你认为我们的存在是为了迎合你吗,
难道你认为这世界都在为你打转吗,
难道你认为我们有义务去迁就你,
难道你又认为我们势必容忍你吗,
那你错了,
我想说的是,
至少我不会那么做,
我的存在是为了我自己,
我并不认为世界只属于你一个人,
所以别在以为你说的话我就得听,
还有我并没有义务去迁就你,
我就是我,
而你对我而言只是很普通的朋友,
我不懂得迁就,
所以请别奢望我会那么做,
我也不懂得容忍,
但我已经在容忍你了,
这是我最后的底线,
我不喜欢容忍,
但我更不喜欢为了一个不值得的人,
让我自己不开心,
很庆幸的是,
你就是那个不值得的人!!
或许,
曾经,
我们可以无话不谈,
也许,
可能,
我们是很好谈的朋友,
可惜,
抱歉,
你的性格不是我能接受的,
原因,
为何,
你自作自受,
别再一直挑拨离间了,
这样做你能得到什么利益吗,
并没有,
但你还选择了如此,
你需要关心,
你需要陪伴,
这些我都知道,
但你用错方式了,
没有任何一个人是属于你的,
别再一直埋怨,
别再说谁比较关心谁,
别再说谁少关心你,
更别再说你被抛离了,
还有,
别再把白的说成黑,
别再颠倒是非,
别再无中生有,
更别再扮可怜,
那样的你真的很惹人厌!!
曾经觉得你是个不错的朋友,
但日子渐渐的过,
就慢慢发现你是个很有心机的人,
你是个只为自己打算的人,
这是朋友应该做的吗,
我想你活了那么久,
却还没完全搞懂什么是朋友吧,
但这并不是重点,
重点是,
我真的觉得,
你是个很有心机的人,
只为自己想,
难道其他人就不是人吗,
如果这就是你的人生,
那我想说,
太悲哀了吧~
我可以是个很好相处的人,
我可以是很随和的人,
我可以笑着面对其他人,
但并不代表我没有脾气,
我是个很暴躁的人,
我是个很容易生气的人,
你的能耐的确不简单,
我发觉你真的惹毛我了,
甚至我不想你出现在我眼前,
我的确拿你没辙,
因为你就是你,
我并没有兴趣去改变你,
或许诸如此类的事,
我只想说,
你,
只是我一个,
比普通还有更普通的朋友,
所以,
请不要再在别人面前埋怨什么,
更不要再无中生有,
我真的顶不顺你那么虚伪的人了!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
寂寞,
每个人都有寂寞的时候,
但寂寞并不可怕,
可怕的是,
竟然遗忘了什么是寂寞,
竟然习惯了寂寞,
人生,
生活,
真的很离奇,
没有人能预测下一秒钟会发生什么事,
我们该对每一件事都抱有希望吗,
还是对一切都保持着憧憬,
我也不晓得,
我只知道这一刻,
我觉得我是幸福的,
即时没有爱情,
亲情,
友情,
对我来说已经占据了我生活的一大部分,
亲情,
我很庆幸出生在这个家庭,
有欢乐,
有争吵,
但欢乐始终能超越争吵,
所以我是幸福的,
友情,
我很庆幸能认识现在的朋友,
虽然有时候我们的性格,
或是会有冲突,
但能有你们,
我真的觉得很幸福,
亲情,
友情,
因为他们,
我不觉得自己是一个人,
我不寂寞,
我很幸福,
是真的!!
为什么会突然说那么多呢,
没特别原因,
只是突然很想说说自己心里所想的,
这样我会觉得轻松多了,
有时候我尝试压抑自己,
我不想再让任何人看见落泪的自己,
我不想再让任何人看见生气地自己,
我在学习,
我在改变,
因为,
我想我的生活只有笑声和欢乐,
我不想听见哭泣声或争吵声,
我希望我身边的人,
都是幸福的,
好吗?
最后,
我想说,
我真的好爱好爱我的家人,
我真的好爱好爱我的朋友,
因为你们,
我相信,
幸福一直都在~

2009年7月24日 星期五

m00dy day><






after crying feel m0re c0mf0rtable,
is a m00dy day f0r me,
i feel that i sh0uld shut up my m0uth,
keep silence,
i hate my lifestyle..

g0 wangsa maju jusc0 with c0llege fren,
t0 eat KFC,
but i'm c0ugh,
s0 anti KFC,
reali thanks jas0n n h0n kit buy McD p0rridge f0r me,
feel t0uch~

why i juz will advise ppl n0t t0 thk ab0ut d pass,
but my 0wnself cant reali did it,
tis is my weakness,
i mus try t0 s0lve it~

jas0n,
h0n kit,
thanks y0u veli much,
mmuacksS~

m0nday psych0l0gy mid term,
and is huey san birthday,
wish all will pass sm00thly,
i will learn t0 be t0ugh,
i will learn t0 be 0ptimistic,
i will learn t0 be silence><
tirred,
c0ugh and seems lk getting flu,
0mg,
H1N1?
n0,
i thk juz n0rmal sick lar,
h0pe it'll rec0ver a.s.a.p!!!

lastly,
just wan t0 thank jas0n again,
y0u're really a g00d guy,
bf0re d thg is she dun0 appreciate,
y0u are d best f0r me,
hehe,
i l0ve y0u my buddy^^







2009年7月23日 星期四

tears

tears keep 0n dr0p d0wn,
what happen t0 me,
wh0 can help me,
feel suffer wen facing all 0f them,
i wan cry,
i wan sh0ut,
but i try t0 pretend,
since when i bc0me lk tat,
why d m0re i try,
d m0re i feel suffer,
i th0ught i can f0rget abt it,
bt why i cant,
n0b0dy can understand wat's in my mind,
i try t0 smile,
i try t0 laugh,
just h0pe tat i can f0rget all th0se thg,
i n0e is hard f0r me,
i n0e is my fault,
i cant blame any0ne,
but suddenly i feel tat i'm l0nely,
i th0ught i'm t0ugh en0ugh,
is wr0ng,
i sh0uld fade away,
i wan be is0later!!!

TEaRS is wat,
L0NELY is wat,
HaPpY is wat,
f0r me,
end my life is best~

i wan fade away,
i wan b silent,
i wan cry~

2009年7月21日 星期二

^^..is a mem0rable birthday f0r me~

dun0 wat sh0uld say lar,
just wan t0 thanks them f0r giving me a special birthday n special gift,
i l0ve it s0 muchie,
tis is d happiest birthday f0r me,
l0ve y0u all s0 much~

jas0n,kreuze,chl0e,h0n kit,tan,keith,nathan,cindy~
my c0llege buddy,
feel hapi t0 kn0w all 0f y0u~

jas0n,
i wil rmb wat y0u say,
i v0n b m00dy anym0re bc0z 0f t0s useless guy,
hehe,
mmuacks~
chl0e,
i n0e i 0ld edi larh,
i v0n b childish j0r,
kaka,
love y0u my dear,
XD~
keith,
thanks f0r y0ur greet,
d0nt say s0rry t0 me,
is 0k,
imp0rtant is y0ur heart,
y0ur pei pei dear v0n angry y0u d,
keke^~^..
kreuze,
i'm hapi juz n0w,
n dun say s0rry 0s0,
y0u all n0t "gu0 fen"larh,
but if y0u thk lk tat,
i will f0rgive y0u 1,
wen y0ur birthday,
make it m0re"gu0 fen"tan tis tm larh,
wakakka@,@~
Tan,
y0u have a new name j0r,
is funny,
tis tm y0u cant eat cake,
nvm,
but wen y0u're 21,
must eat many l0r~

h0n kit,
thanks f0r being a ph0t0 capture man t0day,
help us tak s0 many pic,
n thanks f0r d strepsils instead of seeing me c0ugh,
hehe,
y0u are a g00d guy,
try y0ur best t0 tackle d gal y0u like,
sure will success d,
g00d luck^*^..
j0hn,
thanks f0r d birthday greet,
s0rry f0r sc0lding y0u yesterday c0z 0f d psych0l0gy presentati0n date,
i n0e is n0t y0ur fault,
but my EQ is l0w,
haha
>@<..

金水,
谢谢你在12点时打给我,
谢谢你的生日祝福~

janice,
thx f0r the birthday wish,
alth0ugh we didn't meet n c0ntact each 0ther frequently,
but i feel happy t0 kn0w y0u in my secondary sch00l life,
l0ve y0u and miss y0u~
nin,
thanks f0r y0ur greet,
s0rry arh,
wen y0u birthday i din greet and wish y0u,
f0rgive me w0r..>.0
huey san,
y0u are a kawaii gal,
n thanks f0r y0ur birthday greet,
stay cute^@^
nic0le,
thanks f0r y0ur email w0r,
l0ng tm din see y0u edi,
miss y0u^^
ev0n w0ng,
thanks f0r y0ur msg,
but i change my ph0ne number j0r a,
y0u f0rget j0r a,
dun send t0 tat number 0ledi w0r,
n0t me using edi a,
keke,
but the main p0int is,
can knew y0u in sec0ndary sch00l life is hapi,
thanks f0r helping me s0 much bf0re,
miss y0u all the time^~<
apes,
thanks f0r y0ur early birthday wish,
dun say s0rry t0 me anym0re,
and y0u didn't 0we me anything,
just let all t0s mem0ry fade 0ver the time~
i cant reali rmb still have wh0 larh,
d imp0rtant is,
thanks all 0f y0u!!!
i l0ve all 0f y0u,
mmuacks^*^~

2009年7月7日 星期二



6 julai,
HE presentati0n is 0ver,
n0t satisfy 0n it,
is a n0rmal day f0r me~

7julai,
still a n0rmal f0r me,
chl0e ask did i feel l0nely f0r being single,
i think it s0 seri0usly,
and my answer is NO,
single is perfect life f0r me,
haha~

HATE THE SUN,
my skin bc0me darker,
my face bc0me w0rst,
suck~

starting t0 diet,
keep 0n drinking t0day,
is a g00d beginning f0r me~

2009年7月4日 星期六

我又犯老毛病了,
总是乱发脾气,
我不知怎么了,
或许我该消失~

对不起,
我知道那天我对很多人都发了小姐脾气,
我在尝试着改掉我的坏习惯,
我想我可以的~

拜一的presentati0n,
让我有点害怕,
没为什么,
就单纯的害怕,
哈哈,
我知道可以的,
加油!!!

谢谢jas0n对我说的话,
谢谢你说只要不开心就能找你和kreuze,
很久没有感到那么窝心了,
虽然认识不久,
但我觉得有你们真的很好,
我知道过去应该让它过去,
我已经遗忘了过去,
我只想开心的过每天,
我一定能做到~

d0nt try s0 hard,
the best thing c0mes when y0u least expect them t0~

m0m,
i l0ve y0u~

2009年7月1日 星期三

hapi but 0s0 m00dy~

wake up early t0day,
g0 f0r c0llege just t0 attend 2 h0ur class,
11-12pm,
afterthat break f0r 4 h0ur bef0re the next class,
s0 shit,
d0nt kn0w why,
i feel like i cant c0mmunicate 0r be cl0se friend with any girl,
0ur thinking n0t same,
0ur pass n0t same,
0ur family backgr0und n0t same,
is t0tally different,
i feel suffer t0 hang up with girl,
like will keep 0n arguing 0r what,
s0 i m0re prefer t0 hang up with b0y,
i feel m0re c0mf0rtable,
i can be my 0wnself,
i can say what i want,
i n0 need t0 pretend,
i n0 need t0 scare that what i say isit will make them feel ann0ying,
s0metimes i hate c0llege life!!!

thanks kreuze f0r fetching me and my cute eldest sister back t0day,
g0 eat steamb0t wif them f0r my dinner,
haha,
c0z jas0n l0r,
suddenly say want eat 0rh,
s0 we just straight away say t0day l0r,
i feel hapi t0day,
hang up with jas0n and kreuze,
they are s0 funny,
make me keep 0n laughing,
with them i feel s0 warm,
alth0ugh they n0t really understand me well,
but at least i v0n feel unc0mf0rtable,
thanks~

aiz,
just back h0me then hear m0m and dad arguing,
why,
why keep 0n argue bec0z 0f that pers0n,
why m0m u cant think f0r dad,
why y0u can't think that if y0u were in dad sh0es,
and put y0urself in dad's p0siti0n,
what's the resp0nse 0f y0u?
why,
why y0u want pr0tect him,
we didn't 0we him anything,
we are relative,
but this n0t means that he can s0 irresp0nsible,
but why can't y0u understand dad?
he w0rk s0 hard just t0 earn m0ney f0r us,
f0r us t0 study,
t0 pr0vide us a g00d environment t0 live,
just t0 give the best things he can give t0 us,
i feel s0 t0uch and welfare that he is my daddy,
he is a g00d and resp0nsible dad,
i l0ve him s0 much,
but why can't y0u feel it~

pers0nality,
he is y0ur br0ther,
but at 0ther side,
he is w0rker which employee by dad,
dad just c0me back fr0m kelantan,
drive 6 h0ur t0 c0me back a,
is s0 tired,
but just reach h0me n0t m0re than 1 h0ur then need g0 f0r w0rk again,
why,
just because y0ur br0ther,
din g0 f0r work s0 dad need g0 by his 0wn,
dad just querim0ny a few w0rd,
then y0u sc0ld him and say th0se rubbish things,
why,
i hate it!!!!!

my m00d suddenly dr0p d0wn,
if can ch00se,
i will ch00se t0 g0 back the time when i'm n0t live at here,
rich 0r n0t is n0t the main p0int f0r me,
i wan a warm and l0vely family,
but n0t a family that keep 0n arguing!!!

我想躲在角落哭泣,
我想放声的哭,
只可惜我好像没有泪水了,
我不需要富裕的家庭,
我不需要什么物质上的享受,
我真的可以什么都不要,
我只想回到过去那个没有太多争吵的时候,
我想要的不多,
就只是个温暖的家,
难道我的要求太过分了吗,
我要的不是短暂的温暖,
我希望一直都那么温暖,
我知道偶尔一点争吵是避免不了的,
但最近争吵越来越频繁了,
为什么,
难道这就是生活,
难道这就是生态,
我不要!!!!

爸,
我知道你凡事都会为我们着想,
我知道你有的不多,
却只想把最好的都给我们,
我知道我曾经让你很失望,
让你气的说不要我这个女儿了,
我知道当时的你一定很心痛,
我知道过去的我做了太多让你失望的事,
但爸,
相信我,
我一定会乖,
一定会把书读好,
因为这是我唯一能做的,
谢谢你~

妈,
我不是不乖,
也不是学坏,
我知道你不放心我,
我知道因为以前的事让你对我失去了信心,
我知道你不想我和男子靠的太近,
但妈,
他们只是我的朋友,
我和他们没什么,
而且我会想了,
我不再是以前那个我,
我做什么之前都会顾虑到后果,
我知道以前的我让你心碎了很多次,
但妈,
现在的我会照顾自己了,
相信我好吗,
我在学习着独立~

爸,
妈,
别吵架了好吗,
我不喜欢,
我要开开心心的家庭,
我爱你们~